Dealing with Emotions

Short of the death of a loved one, there's almost nothing as devastating as learning you have a chronic illness like arthritis. A strong emotional reaction is a natural response; discovering that your life has been changed can send you into a spiral of emotions — what psychologists call the grief cycle.

We don't just grieve over death; we grieve over loss, and every chronic illness involves losses. It could be the loss of a job; it could be the loss of self-respect or a loss of activities we previously enjoyed, whether it's sports or recreation or socializing. As a result, we may experience a sense of purposelessness or a lack of any sense of meaning in our lives. That can cause terrible emotional upset.

For many, a classic symptom of arthritis is depression — feelings of helplessness and isolation, lack of meaning and prolonged despondency, mood swings and emotional outbursts, sleep disorders and lack of appetite, leading to significant weight loss. As a result, some people end up abusing alcohol and drugs; they may develop a poor self-image and even lose their will to live. Some people never find their way out of this emotional tumble, and some have even entertained thoughts of suicide.

All the depression, despair and suicidal thoughts can be dealt with, though. It isn't easy — not least because you've got your arthritis to deal with, too — but they can be turned back, and you can rediscover meaning in your life. You can learn to accept the fact of your arthritis and learn how to deal with it in a real and lasting way.

Thousands of people have made that journey. Some of them even believe their lives are better because of what they've learned — because of their arthritis. That may be a lot to ask; not everyone can achieve that degree of acceptance, but everyone can learn to find their own level of emotional balance. 

This page was last reviewed/updated on : 02/23/2008